We had the room setup as usual but we now have a wooden
table replacing the plastic one.
We sat half hour later than usual this week and I did the
opening prayer at 9.05pm, turned out the light and put the first tune on.
We did the rainbow bridge visualisation exercise…
Liz found herself on a strand of hard sand with snaking sea
water like an estuary. She was walking on the sand towards a Spanish galleon
and as she got closer she saw lots of brightly coloured people on board, almost
like Mother Hubbard’s Shoe. Liz went on board with them and they changed into a
sort of drawing that was drawing itself, a very free-form flow like Felix Topolski
used to do. It was as if Liz was looking at some of his drawings. Liz also felt
she was still walking on the sand watching this boat keep disappearing into
this drawing, like a Chinese drawing. She realised it was a bit like watching
footsteps disappearing in the sand, the insubstantiality of things. It reminded
her of dreams and one of the exercises of preparing to have lucid dreams. Then
suddenly it was like she was looking at Nell Gwynn in a play with a basket of
oranges back in Elizabethan times and it struck her the significance of oranges
if you’re going on a long voyage in a galleon, they’d discovered that you
needed oranges to prevent scurvy and keep healthy. Then she saw tomatoes,
squashes and various fruit and veg that have vitamin C. Liz had the feeling
that the message was if you’re going on this long journey into altered
conscious states or lucid dreaming you’re going on a consciousness voyage into
new unchartered territory and you have to be healthy, you have to prepare
yourself…
I started off on top of a huge slide so I slid down it and
then realised I was sliding down the trunk of a giant elephant. When I got to
the bottom I just sat there as the elephant walked slowly along a pathway lined
with trees. Then a giant gorilla came out from the trees and picked me up in
its hand, a bit like the film King Kong, and I was carried along the path until
the gorilla stopped at a tall tree and deposited me on the top. I was wondering
how I would get down when a giant heron flew down and picked me up in its foot
then flew high into the sky. I noticed it had a blanket hanging from its beak
with something in it. Then we started to descend towards a grassy field full of
yellow flowers next to a lake. The heron let me go on the grass and gently
placed the blanket by the side of the lake and I saw it had a baby in it and
there were more babies in a line on blankets beside the lake. The heron then
took off leaving me with all these babies that were crying out. Then an old
lady appeared and tended to the babies so I asked her where I was. She told me
I was at the start of a journey for all these babies and I was also starting
this journey. She said that on this journey I was going to see and experience
new things, it would be something to enjoy and not the force it, just let it
happen naturally, there was no rush…
Interestingly we had both been at the start of an
unchartered journey to experience new things this week.
I put the music back on and we continued the session…
The room soon started to flicker and looked wavy to me.
I felt pressure around my right ear.
Then I started to see bright blobs coming and going in front
of me.
I tried to become one with a blob and felt it draw closer to
me. I sensed a person in a purple hooded robe in front of me and they put their
hands on my head. I tried to see a face but saw several different faces that
kept changing. My arms started to feel fuzzy and then I fell asleep.
Liz also fell asleep about this time and we both woke up
just before the music CD finished playing.
Neither of us brought back any dream experiences and Liz
took a while to realise were she was.
The music stopped playing and Liz began to speak…
‘I have an image of a
starfish… Doreen or Dorothy… I seem to be looking at these fine spider webs but
they’re plants and flower heads, like May blossom, intricate, grasses’
‘I’ve got Pegasus,
flying horse’
‘I’ve got an image of
a doily, a lace mat, table mat… Carol Clarke, the name of my Dad’s secretary… I
have the sense of thick brown fur like a coat or a blanket… It’s taken me
somehow to Regents Park so I’m in London, Bakers Street, the Planetarium, Madame
Tussauds… Victoria and Albert museum, I think that was where Carol Clark took
me. I’m coming back to embroidered hankies, very Victorian, intricate lace
work. I think Carols wearing black, maybe it’s her own funeral or someone else’s
funeral. I’d like to ask her what conditions she’s in now, just seem to be
getting images of London, old red busses, these are memories Carol, so where
are you now? Corinthians, speak with the tongues of angels but have not love,
then it becomes a tinkling brass, faith hope and charity and the greatest of
these is charity. I think Carol is thinking about love. I think she’s
recognised the value of love. I wonder have you found love where you are now? I
get the sense there’s a lot of love where she is now. She didn’t get to
experience it before but her connection with me was a loving one. I think there
was a difference between the artefacts and the woven doily, the objects and
living things, natural world, flowers, intricate nature of the real blossoms,
nature in the raw and the fine art fineries, manmade objects which are
beautiful but they lack the vibrancy of the natural world and that’s become
very alive in this new place. The values of living, that thick fur, textures.
One can be too refined, too cultured, too caught up in the artificial world of
man’s creation and overlook the delights of nature in the raw, of natural
objects’
It now seemed like Carol had taken over and was speaking…
‘I would say that some
have to pass over the threshold into a new life to appreciate the natural
physical world. Seems paradoxical to leave the world in order to appreciate it
but it’s come alive for me and the meaning of the poems, now it’s living in
singing truth. I know what the love is now, I can feel the love force but it’s
a wonder to me that the civilization being civilized can kill the natural
appreciation, the real love that our society, our education, our values swart
love, love of the living thing so it becomes less, too much fascination with
artefacts in civilisation. I would say learn to fly, learn to sing, learn to
love and unlearn all the rest. I’m sitting in a deckchair in the sun, just
sunning myself. Now I can feel the sun, gentle, it’s like I’m on holiday. When
I say holiday I mean holy day, my holiday is a holy day. So where I am I would
say is a blessed place, a place of love and relaxation. I’m extremely happy in
a way I didn’t know before or perhaps I always knew but it was hidden by the
lace curtains, fascination with lace’
Liz then got the name Templeton or Temple Bar, London.
Carol continued…
‘We have places and
times overlapping and I have the sense of this layered reality like layers of a
sandwich, like looking through different layers of tissue of grease proof paper, you can see the
one though the other, it’s difficult to see which one you’re actually looking
at and then there’s a sense of being pulled away, flowing away. It’s very hard
to fix your view, your viewpoint. There’s a sense of freedom, travel, roaming,
it’s like being a bird’
Liz got the name Diane, the Lion, Witch and the Wardrobe,
Narnia.
Liz saw some words written on a slate…
‘I cry every morning,
I water the world with my tears, charming the face of the lambkins, grey now
with fears, startled by all around me, all is not as it appears’
Liz then got…
‘Droyless and Cressida
were my allies, am I Sofraces?’
Carol continued…
‘I have an answer,
we’ve all been each other, we’ve all been writing this great parody. You don’t
have to worry who you are; you can be whoever you are, whoever you want,
whoever you were, whoever you will be. You are who I am; I am who you are…
Great scholars and thinkers alike puzzle at the edge of the abyss and then fall
in. Puzzle not, jump feet first, we’re all fit for fun, we’re all suited to
delight’
Liz felt Carol was dropping her lots of words, golden
nuggets for her little nut tree.
Carol continued…
‘Is there anything
you’d like to ask before we finish?’
Me… ‘When we try and
think about the non-physical reality it’s very difficult to understand it
because we have to think of it in terms of what we understand, i.e. the
physical reality. I just wondered if there’s any easier way of understanding
the non-physical reality without using physical objects to describe it’
‘Taste and see, enter
into the experience, allow, allow yourself to swim in the sensations and the
experience, the feeling of it, the quality. Goodness doesn’t have a form or a
shape, these are qualities, these are feelings, they’re not fixed in a sense of
a rock or a brick or a hat which is a shape and a form and an object you
recognise but you say kindness, warmth, mercurial, shimmering, these are the
sensory qualities. Do you understand what I’m saying?’
Me… ‘Yes that makes
sense’
‘By these things you
can know the shape and the sense of a non-physical reality without it being in
bricks and mortar and then when you sense qualities, beauty for example, you
can build up around it objects that you find beautiful but they have in common
a quality of beauty. Beauty could be the face of a person you love, could be
the wing of a bird, a feather, could be a rose, could be the Taj Mahal, a stain
glass window, all these things may seem beautiful, have a quality of beauty.
They all have a feeling about them that makes you think they’re beautiful but
you could transpose a black bird’s egg for a diamond and still have beauty. The
egg can smash, the diamond can be ground to powder but you still have the
memory of beauty, it can’t disappear, it’s a constant throughout its changing
forms. So in the non-physical reality it’s understood more, the nature of the
impermanent objects that we regard as physical, the qualities speak more and
have the lasting edge, they’re the more fundamental, it’s understood. So if you
have appreciated the qualities of beauty, love, tenderness, clarity, the
physical reality, or the objects you create in your whatever reality will
contain, will resonate with those feelings. If the qualities you experience are
depression, dismalness, disgust, distain, dislike, hatred, irritation, the
objects that are created for you to manifest your reality will resonate with
these feelings, sharp, jagged, ugly, dull, but all those objects are only
transitory appearances of the underlying quality. So you will appreciate the
non-physical reality according to the qualities that you appreciate, the
qualities that you are able to attune to, those that you feel and those would
describe for you a reality but it’s only a description of these qualities that
you are resonating with but it’s all transitory, you can change it. So your
question was how can you appreciate a non-physical reality without trying to
make it concrete. The answer is you do appreciate it but it’s a natural
tendency to try and make it concrete but the concreteness that you make it will
be out of the qualities that you have appreciated and sensed. So your
non-physical reality is with you all the time but you just need to tune in to
what it is you’re sensing and feel more aware. To be aware of the qualities
that you’re sensing in yourself, in your inner life and they underpin both your
physical and your non-physical realities because he will see a beautiful world
in this Earth of yours, of ours, or he will see a dreary, woebegone, hateful
world, but it’s all one world… Does that answer make sense to you?’
Me… ‘Perfect sense
yes, makes me think about it in a different way, thank you for that’
Liz was now back in control…
‘Perhaps we should
finish now and thank Carol for sharing and we send our love and where you are
is a good place I can tell, God bless you, thank you, thank you for your
presence on Earth and for your contact, treasured memories we both shared and
send my love to dad, the scribe’
I put the music on for a while as Liz came fully back with
it.
She got the Courtauld Institute of Art and the Huguenots as
she came back.
I did the healing exercise, closing prayer and our closing
down exercise…